MAY 2022 IGNOMINIOUS ABSURDITY OF THE MONTH: THE IGGY

1. Rep. Matt Gaetz. Rep. Matt Gaetz, who is currently under investigation for having sex with a 17-year-old girl, and is the only member of Congress to vote against a law boosting the government’s human trafficking investigatory powers, has big thoughts on women who are upset about Roe v. Wade being overturned by the Supreme Court.

“How many of the women rallying against overturning Roe are over-educated, under-loved Millennials who sadly return from protests to a lonely microwave dinner with their cats, and no bumble matches?”

The only way to make sense of the sicko Gaetz is to assume he’s using his soapbox to promote himself for a future media gig, except he’s so extreme Fox doesn’t even want him. That’s saying something. He’ll probably have to settle for a gig as a resident Trump flatterer at Mira Logo.

2. Maine Senator Susan Collins. Collins is apparently missing the complete bloody obvious, i.e., that packing the court with a bunch of right-wing ideologues would result in them trying to overturn Roe v Wade.  Gosh, Senator, I wonder who could have predicted such an outcome? Hmm. The answer, of course is, umm, pretty damned much EVERYBODY who hasn’t been in a coma in a deep cave located in a remote jungle since, oh, pre-1973.

Anyway, Senator Collins is totally flabbergasted, stunned, and no doubt concerned that according to her, Gorsuch and Kavanaugh lied  (gasp!) to her about their intentions vis a vis Roe v Wade if they were to be appointed to SCOTUS.

"If this leaked draft opinion is the final decision and this reporting is accurate, it would be completely inconsistent with what Justice Gorsuch and Justice Kavanaugh said in their hearings and in our meetings in my office," Collins said in a statement. "Obviously, we won't know each Justice's decision and reasoning until the Supreme Court officially announces its opinion in this case."

Huh. Imagine expecting a guy credibly accused of raping a woman as a young man lying about something in order to get his sociopathic ass implanted firmly onto a seat on the most powerful court in the country. Funny old world, innit, Senator?

I expect next week we’ll be seeing headlines that Senator Collins is surprised to discover that water is, indeed, wet.

3. Nebraska Governor Pete Ricketts. On CNN this morning, Ricketts tossed aside the evasions his Republican Party used to rely on to assure American women that Republicans would not, in fact, force them to give birth to the babies of their rapists. No abortion exceptions for incest or rape, said Ricketts. None.

CNN's Dana Bash: "Do you think that the state of Nebraska should require a young girl who was raped to carry that pregnancy to term?"

Gov. Pete Ricketts: "Those are babies, too." Bash: "Including in the case of rape or incest?" Ricketts: "Yes, they’re still babies."

Under Republican government in Nebraska and elsewhere, a 12-year old girl raped by her father will carry that pregnancy to term.

It's a position that is almost required, if one truly believes in the "personhood" of a fertilized egg with no organs or nervous system. Pete Ricketts knows not a damn thing about medicine but has strong religious convictions that he believes should override medical knowledge—not for him, but for every last American of every religion or no religion, in any circumstance, enforced by the powers of the state.

4. Representative Elise Stefanik (R-NY). The ambitious Stefanik was catapulted to a top House Republican leadership position after Republicans purged Rep. Liz Cheney from the role as punishment for speaking out against Donald Trump's violent attempted coup. Stefanik has since proven to have no moral boundaries whatsoever, eagerly embracing the farthest-right conspiracy theories culled from QAnon, from neo-Nazi groups, and other extremists—but we knew that, due to her fervent prior backing of an actual attempted coup and her devotion now to sabotaging investigations of that coup.

The ignominious House Republican was on a roll this month. First, she claimed that President Biden is shipping infant formula to undocumented immigrants at the expense of Americans. Then, she described Democrats as “pedo grifters, borrowing language from the baseless pro-Trump QAnon conspiracy theory that claims there is a Satin-worshiping shipping cabal of liberal pedophiles.

And, after the deadly mass shooting in Buffalo, where a heavily armed white man, citing the Neo-Nazi “great replacement” theory, a white supremacist conspiracy theory that claims world elites are importing non-white immigrants in great numbers to delude America’s “whiteness,” Stefanik offered only vague sympathy for the victims. Of course, she did. Stefanik, like Tucker Carlson, has been a promoter of that same Neo-Nazi conspiracy theory. She is one of the House Republicans that helped mainstream it into the party proper.

Stefanik did not just embrace the "great replacement" theory as a one-off nod to the party’s white supremacist base, she launched a Facebook ad campaign pushing the conspiracy theory that was considered abhorrent at the time and looks even more grotesque now that it has yet again become the cited impetus for a mass murder.

Like Tucker Carlson, she uses violence-provoking conspiracy claims to further her own career while ignoring or mocking the deaths caused when violent believers decide that only terrorism can prevent their advertised conspiracy from taking place. The "great replacement" conspiracy is now widespread Republican rhetoric; there is now no great difference between the spittle-flecked conspiracies of Neo-Nazism and those of Republican Party "leadership."

The Republican Party is a cesspit. From national leaders to minor state functionaries, its officials stoke violence like it is nothing to them. Party propagandists invent new hoaxes for every situation, hoping that the resulting extremism boosts them even if it kills others. It makes perfect sense that the fascist supporters of an attempted coup would expel Liz Cheney from leadership while embracing this perpetually amoral liar and propagandist; that is who they are.

5. Madison Cawthorn (R-NC). Cawthorn is a poster child for what it takes to be IGGY Hall-of-Shame-worthy. With his lashing out at Republican leaders who abandoned him in the recent North Carolina primary, the ignominious one has firmly established his HOS credentials. He will be inducted, along with Matt Gaetz, at the end of this year.

An overview: Cawthorn previously faced accusations that he had lied about key parts of his background and that he had been sexually and verbally aggressive toward women. In recent months, he also has been accused of engaging in insider trading, charged with driving with a revoked license and stopped for trying to bring a gun through airport security — a second time. Photos and videos of him partying and emulating sexual antics circulated. In March, he said on a conservative You Tube channel that people he had admired in Washington had invited him to orgies and used cocaine.

But perhaps most IGGY-worthy is Cawthorn’s track record of missing important votes in Congress and his announcement last year that he would run in a new district near Charlotte, only to change his mind and return to his old district after the new district was redrawn and tilted Democratic.

Alas, lacking the support of Republican Party leaders, Cawthorn went down to defeat in North Carolina’s recent party primary. Could it be that GOP leaders have, finally, demonstrated that they can indeed purge extremists in their ranks? Has the party finally drawn a line?

Not! Cawthorn wasn’t purged because he spewed white supremacy, supported armed insurrection, or espoused violence—he did all of that, as have wing nut House colleagues like Marjorie Taylor Greene, Paul Gosar, Matt Gaetz, Lauren Boebert, Andy Biggs, Brent Laudermilk… the list is long. His real sin was claiming, or revealing, that Republican colleagues invited him to orgies and that he saw them doing cocaine.

After that, House minority leader Kevin McCarthy summoned him for a scolding, and North Carolina’s senior GOP senator, Thom Tillis put his muscle behind the challenger who defeated him, state Senator Chuck Edwards. Oh, and somebody leaked embarrassing photos of Cawthorn in women’s lingerie, as well as what looked like sex play with his staffer/roommate/cousin. That’s not disqualifying, of course, in the modern GOP. His original sin was talking about drugs and orgies, which many believe led to the embarrassing leaks—not his right-wing extremism and enthusiasm for guns.

Cawthorn loves his guns. He’s been cited twice in the last few months for trying to bring his gun aboard a plane. He hailed the acquittal of Kenosha killer Kyle Rittenhouse by urging supporters to “be armed, be dangerous.” He warned, after Trump’s defeat, that if American elections “continue to be rigged” and “stolen,” it would lead to “bloodshed”—and he would help shed the blood. He did say, “There’s nothing I would dread doing more than having to pick up arms against a fellow American,” but also, “I am willing to defend our liberty at all costs.”

Cawthorn is clearly a disturbed young man. He lied about details of the car crash that left him paralyzed at 20—he said the car’s driver left him to die, although his then-friend actually pulled him from the wreckage. He falsely claimed he was admitted to the Naval Academy. He’s been accused of sexual harassment by multiple women. I hope he gets the help he needs, but he’ll probably get a Fox contract.

The sicko seems to be unraveling: On Thursday he posted a crazy rant to Instagram, railing against the “Uni-party” and “globalist” establishment, promising an end to “gentile” politics (gentle? genteel? Perhaps an anti-Semitic Freudian slip?) and declaring, “It’s time for dark MAGA to truly take command.” He promised to defeat his “weak and cowardly” GOP enemies. “Their days are numbered. We are coming,” he closed, before adding a list of his allies, including Trump, Tucker Carlson, Marjorie Taylor Greene, Matt Gaetz, Senator Rand Paul, and more.

Cawthorn’s defeat Tuesday isn’t a victory for democracy; it’s just another GOP tragedy. Featured at the 2020 Republican National Convention, he was abandoned by the party that created him—but again, for his bizarre claims (or perhaps truth-telling) about GOP orgies and drug abuse, not his right-wing, violence-promoting extremism. Sure, Donald Trump endorsed him, and any day Trump loses is a good day.

But Edwards, the Republican who defeated Cawthorn, is himself a Trump-supporting right-wing extremist who says he’ll work hard to send the twice-impeached former president back to the White House. That’s no loss for Trump. And a lot of extremists Trump endorsed won Tuesday’s primaries, including North Carolina Representative Ted Budd, now the party’s Senate nominee, and wing nut January 6 riot attendee Doug Mastriano, who got the GOP nomination for Pennsylvania governor. (Trump endorsee and New Jersey resident Dr. Mehmet Oz is leading in Pennsylvania’s Senate nomination by about a thousand votes, which will probably lead to a recount.  Expect Trumpers to deny thousands of mail-in ballots on flimsy technical grounds.) Does anyone need more to validate that today’s GOP is Trump’s party?

And, can anyone deny that Madison Cawthorn deserves membership in the IGGY Hall-of-Shame?

6. Georgia Republican Senator Nominee Herschel Walker. This is how Hershel Walker responded on Tuesday night when asked about gun control in the wake of a shooter killing 21 people, including 19 children, at an Uvalde, Texas, elementary school hours earlier: Walker responded: “What I like to do is see it and everything and stuff.” He didn’t engage further.

Illuminating!

The hollow incoherence on display here is sadly typical of the man Georgia’s Republican voters just deemed worthy of representing them in the Congress. There’s a good reason his handlers have kept him largely away from the press, much less allowing him to debate.

Given time later to clarify his thoughts, Walker spoke with Fox News. When asked about gun reform legislation, the former Cowboys running back and Heisman Trophy winner fumbled all over himself with another mystifying, vague and baffling answer.

“You know, Cain killed Abel, and that’s a problem that we have. And I said, what we need to do is look into how we can stop those things,” Walker began.

“You talk about doing a disinformation," Walker continued. "What about getting a department that can look at young men that's looking at women, that's looking at their social media? What about doing that, looking into things like that, and we can stop that that way,” Walker said.

Whatever the fuck does all of that mean?

Walker then talked about allocating money for mental health rather than “taking away your Constitutional rights,” but offered no solutions or programs.

Walker is probably the worst qualified candidate to ever run for the U.S. Senate, and, probably, the dumbest as well. Along with Tommy Tuberville and Louie Gohmert he would form a trio to put the Three Stooges to shame. Only in America.

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And the May IGGY winner is:

I’d like to give this month’s award to Herschel Walker, but he’s probably more moronic than outright evil, though the verdict is still out on this. Cawthorn is certainly worthy, but as a future Hall-of-Shamer, he will get his due later. So, I’m awarding this month’s IGGY to the deplorable Elise Stefanik.